In other news, I am afraid I have had to expel Bishop William Richardson from the Society. I have been remarkably tolerant of Bishop Richardson over the years. When he wrote an article entitled ‘mantilly lace and a pretty face’ on the role of women in society, I took no action. When he reinterpreted the Four Marks of the Church to suit his own ends, I merely raised an eyebrow. When he questioned the wholesomeness of Julie Andrews, I simply let out a small sigh and raised my other eyebrow.
But this time, my dear faithful, he has gone too far. He has repeatedly denied the claim of the Society to have over a million supporters worldwide. Indeed, he has said that the real number is just a fraction of that figure and our numbers simply don’t stack up. Before anyone is tempted to join Bishop Richardson into his so-called Society of Strictly Pious Observing Gents, I suggest that they do the maths! We have around 500 priests in Our Society and each of those priests says on average two Masses on a Sunday – that’s 1,000 Masses! On average, each of our Mass Centres has a congregation of 1,000. As I said, my dear faithful, do the maths – a thousand times a thousand makes a million!
Incidentally, I understand that Bishop Richardson is claiming that his expulsion was ‘unjust and therefore invalid’. I should make it clear that our statutes are very clear. By virtue of my office of Superior Major General of the Society, I am the successor of Archbishop Le Havre and as such I have full jurisdictional power in the Society. Once I pronounce a sentence, it is binding and there is no appeal.